Am mai scris despre asta<\/a>. Dar trebuie s\u0103 mai scriu din c\u00e2nd \u00een c\u00e2nd, ca s\u0103 nu uit ce am sim\u021bit \u0219i de ce. \u0218i ca s\u0103 nu fie doar ceva care s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat o dat\u0103 \u0219i am trecut peste.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n
Azi am ales din nou.<\/p>\n
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Am ales \u00eentre Leucemie Limfoblastic\u0103 acut\u0103, retinoblastom, Retard sever \u00een dezvoltarea motorie, psihic\u0103 \u0219i limbaj, tetraparez\u0103 flasc\u0103, epilepsie cu crize polimorfe, sindromul autist, din nou retinoblastom, neuroblastom. M-am oprit aici c\u0103ci nu mai aveam resurse psihice. Diagnostice mai erau, multe, prea multe.<\/p>\n
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Criteriul? Imposibil de stabilit. A\u0219a c\u0103 de data asta am ales stupid, emo\u021bional, f\u0103r\u0103 nici un sens logic: are \u00a0aceea\u0219i dat\u0103 de na\u0219tere cu fata mea. At\u00e2t.<\/p>\n
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C\u00e2nd ra\u021bionalul \u00eenceteaz\u0103 s\u0103 mai dea sens, trebuie s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi g\u0103se\u0219ti un substitut. F\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 ui\u021bi c\u0103 exist\u0103 ra\u021bional, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 te min\u021bi \u0219i s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi faci r\u0103u \u021bie \u0219i celor din jur invent\u00e2nd un pseudo-ra\u021bional cu care s\u0103 \u00ee\u021bi \u00eenlocuie\u0219ti realitatea. Doar l\u0103s\u00e2ndu-l un pic deoparte \u0219i aleg\u00e2nd emo\u021bional.<\/p>\n
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A\u0219a c\u0103 azi ur\u0103sc. Nu pentru mult timp. M\u0103 \u021bine o jum\u0103tate de or\u0103, o or\u0103 maxim. Dup\u0103 care \u00eencet-\u00eencet se estompeaz\u0103, ca s\u0103 o iau de la cap\u0103t luna viitoare.<\/p>\n
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C\u00e2teodat\u0103 ur\u0103sc pa\u0219nic, beningn, aproape jainistic. Azi nu.<\/p>\n
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Azi ur\u0103sc visceral, ur\u0103sc cu patos, ur\u0103sc mai mult decat a\u0219 putea vreodat\u0103 s\u0103 iubesc.<\/p>\n
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Ur\u0103sc faptul c\u0103 pot at\u00e2t de pu\u021bin fa\u021b\u0103 de c\u00e2t ar fi nevoie. Ur\u0103sc faptul c\u0103 este nevoie de at\u00e2t de mult. Dar mai presus dec\u00e2t orice, azi ur\u0103sc ceea ce \u00een mod normal doar ironizez \u0219i vreau s\u0103 schimb. Azi ur\u0103sc pove\u0219tile care se vor fapte, ur\u0103sc renun\u021barea voluntar\u0103 la realitate \u0219i g\u00e2nd, ur\u0103sc minciuna autosuficient\u0103. \u0218i ca s\u0103 nu ur\u0103sc steril doar concepte \u0219i idei, azi ur\u0103sc oameni \u0219i institu\u021bii.<\/p>\n
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\u00cei ur\u0103sc pe cei care folosesc toate aceste sl\u0103biciuni ale firii umane ca s\u0103 omoare spiritul, s\u0103 alimenteze frica, s\u0103 anestezieze umanitatea din noi, s\u0103 dezbine, s\u0103 despart\u0103, s\u0103 manipuleze, s\u0103 conduca \u0219i s\u0103 se \u00eemboga\u021beasc\u0103 \u00een timp ce predic\u0103 smerenia \u0219i milostenia. \u00cei ur\u0103sc pe cei care str\u00e2ng hulpav \u0219i distructiv resurse care altfel ar trebui s\u0103 ajung\u0103 \u00een cercetare, vindecare, avans tehnologic, s\u0103 ne scoat\u0103 odat\u0103 din Evul Mediu \u00een care \u00eenc\u0103 tr\u0103im cu spiritul.<\/p>\n
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Peste vreo ora \u00eens\u0103, nu o s\u0103 mai ur\u0103sc. Pentru c\u0103 nu ajut\u0103. Este doar o refulare. Este ceea ce vor ei s\u0103 fac, pentru c\u0103 ura omoar\u0103 argumentele, \u00eengroap\u0103 dreptatea \u0219i fur\u0103 din legitimitatea demersului.<\/p>\n
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Dup\u0103 ce refulez \u00een aceste c\u00e2teva r\u00e2nduri, nu o s\u0103 mai ur\u0103sc nici concepte, nici idei, nici oameni \u0219i nici institu\u021bii. O s\u0103 redevin ra\u021bional \u0219i o s\u0103 merg mai departe ironiz\u00e2nd \u0219i \u00eencerc\u00e2nd s\u0103 schimb lucrurile cum m\u0103 pricep.<\/p>\n
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O s\u0103 r\u00e2d din nou r\u0103ut\u0103cios \u0219i sarcastic de b\u0103rba\u021bii \u00eembr\u0103ca\u021bi \u00een rochii stralucitoare care condamn\u0103 al\u021bi b\u0103rba\u021bi \u00eembr\u0103ca\u021bi \u00een rochii str\u0103lucitoare, de oameni divor\u021ba\u021bi care au copii de care nu mai \u0219tiu nimic de ani de zile \u0219i care ne \u00eenva\u021b\u0103 valorile familiei, de vajnici ap\u0103ratori ai cur\u0103\u021beniei intelectuale care sunt la fel de plagiatori ca cei c\u0103tre care arat\u0103 acuzator.<\/p>\n
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O s\u0103 r\u00e2d \u00eencerc\u00e2nd s\u0103 dau un m\u0103car un pic la o parte cortina dup\u0103 care se ascunde maestrul p\u0103pu\u0219ar.<\/p>\n
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Asta p\u00e2n\u0103 data viitoare.<\/p>\n
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P\u00e2n\u0103 c\u00e2nd o s\u0103 mai ur\u0103sc un pic c\u00e2nd\u00a0 o s\u0103 citesc din nou \u201dCopilul acesta a fost un dar de la Dumnezeu. Acum are cancer \u0219i moare. Ne rug\u0103m lui Dumnezeu s\u0103 \u00eel ajute\u201d \u0219i o s\u0103 vreau s\u0103 \u00eentreb, acid \u0219i disperat \u00een acela\u0219i timp: \u201dSerios? Ai g\u00e2ndit vreun pic \u00eenainte s\u0103 pariezi cu via\u021ba unui copil pe o poveste cu vr\u0103jitori, plante \u0219i animale vorbitoare?\u201d<\/p>\n
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<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\u0218tiu, m\u0103 apuc\u0103 \u00een fiecare lun\u0103. Am mai scris despre asta. Dar trebuie s\u0103 mai scriu din c\u00e2nd \u00een c\u00e2nd, ca s\u0103 nu uit ce am sim\u021bit \u0219i de<\/p>\n
READ MORE<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1608,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10,15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1607","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nu-gandi-ca-doare","category-esti-pidosnic"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1607","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1607"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1607\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1619,"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1607\/revisions\/1619"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1608"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1607"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1607"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/antipatic.ro\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1607"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}